A close friend suggested today I should watch a TED talk with Brene Brown on the topic of “vulnerability”. And so I did, and as synchronicity has it the concepts she mentioned were things I have been playing with in the last few days.
I will summarize here the main points as I heard them and it may also be worth watching Brene’s talk below; she is funny, especially if you can relate to either the academic and/or the psychologist perspectives!
Brene mentioned that the common traits of wholehearted people are: 1) courage; in that the original meaning of the word is about telling the story of who you are with your whole heart, and having the courage to be imperfect, 2) compassion; being kind to yourself first so that you can be kind to others as well, 3) connection; as it relates to authenticity-letting go of who you think you should be in order to be who you are.
She used examples such as “being willing to say I love you first”, “being willing to commit to a relationship that may or may not work out”, or “being willing to do something where there are no guarantees. “
Furthermore, she added that as we attempt to numb vulnerability (through the use, for example, of alcohol, medication, addictions, as well as perfectionism, pretense and making things that are uncertain certain) we also numb the feelings of joy, gratitude, love. Because there is no such thing as cutting out one emotion-we cannot do so selectively- thus a whole array of other beautiful emotions get also numbed, quite a vicious cycle.
As we end 2011, I would invite you to consider where in your life there is room for more vulnerability; where can you express yourself more authentically; whom can you communicate with strictly from your heart if rejection and heartache were not an option; where could you love yourself more; which area in your life could you commit more to, so that 2012 is the year you create what you wish for?
And so it is with many blessings!
Happy New Year,